Should you let your dog sleep in bed with you?

Should you let your dog sleep in bed with you?
Haley Young
7 Oct
2024

My blue heeler sleeps in bed with us about half the time. Her snuggles are the sweetest—she loves plopping herself right between me and my partner—and I appreciate the extra warmth on cold nights in our converted camper van. On hot evenings, though? Cramming three creatures in such a small space is a recipe for disaster. We feel more socially connected when we wake up to morning snuggles... but we get deeper, uninterrupted rest if Scout stays in her crate instead. So we split the difference.

That's what works for us. Here's a pros-and-cons deep dive to help figure out what works for you!

Let's debunk some myths about dogs in the bed

Some dog trainers draw a hard "no dogs in the bed" boundary. Others say our pets' sleeping arrangements have no impact on their behavior. What's the truth?

Sleeping in your bed will not make your dog "dominant"

You might have heard that dogs seek elevated surfaces like furniture because it puts them in a "dominant position." Old-school dog training wisdom claimed our pets were always fighting for their place in a hierarchy. Every move was calculated to usurp our authority—and training protocols focused on "being the alpha" in response.

Today we know there's no evidence to support this.

To get technical: It's true that dominance exists. Canines and humans are both social creatures, and some form of structure is common in family groups. But "dominance" has long been misunderstood by dog trainers preoccupied with wrangling wild animals instead of cooperating with the domesticated ones actually at our feet. In reality, dominance is flexible. It usually hinges on access to resources, which—spoiler alert—you automatically have much more of than your dog does. (Thanks, opposable thumbs!)

Don't worry about dominance in your relationship with your dog. Worry about clear communication and interactions you both enjoy.

Sleeping in bed with you will not cause behavioral problems

But it can contribute to them if your dog already struggles with certain situations. Let's unpack the nuance!

Many dogs share their person's bed for years on end without a single issue. If sleeping with us caused behavioral problems? We'd see far more unstable canine companions. This doesn't mean nighttime arrangements have no potential impact, though.

  • Physical health is an important component of behavior. If your pup doesn't get enough deep rest—dogs need more sleep than humans—they could be at greater risk of overarousal, reactivity, and similar problems.
  • Resource guarding is a natural canine instinct that can become a big issue in modern human homes. If your dog growls or snaps when you try to join them in your bed? You'll want to get in touch with a trainer you trust—and keep them off the area they guard for everyone's safety in the meantime. (As you work through a training plan, you might be able to allow your pup back in bed later on.)
  • Separation anxiety is a complex condition. Sleeping in bed with your dog does not cause it. But if your pup struggles to feel confident without you in view? Practicing their ability to settle by themselves might be worthwhile.

Possible pros of sharing the bed with your dog

Snuggles can boost social connection

Humans and domestic dogs form deep bonds. (That's not news to anyone reading this.) Our relationships go beyond surface-level feelings—there's a neurochemical explanation for the closeness we feel to our pets! Physical affection and "mutual gaze" (looking into each other's eyes) can produce oxytocin in both us and our dogs.

When my partner and I fostered two sets of puppies, Scout got less attention from us during the day—so we invited her to sleep with us for extra social time overnight. She was much happier.

You both might feel calmer

If given the chance, many dogs choose to sleep near their people. We give them comfort—and they give it right back! You're in good company if you feel more relaxed with your pup nearby. (Nothing lulls me to sleep like my heelers deep breathing.)

Your pup can help get you up in the morning

If you have a hard time starting the day, a four-legged alarm clock might be just what you need. This works best for energetic dogs familiar with a morning routine. (Beware if you have a sleepyhead pup who will encourage you to stay in bed longer.)

You can supervise your dog throughout the night

When Scout first started having seizures, I wasn't able to sleep unless she was in the same room as me. I wanted to be there—right away—if she had another episode. While crate training is one way to ensure our pups stay safe in a single place overnight, sleeping in bed with them can be another.

It's just plain cute

Sometimes that's all the reason we need.

Potential cons of letting your dog sleep in your bed

You might not sleep as deeply

Initial studies suggest people sleep less well if they sharing their bed with a dog. (This effect is only observed when our pups are actually in bed with us—not just in the same room.) If you struggle to feel rested when your alarm goes off, keeping a dog-free mattress might help.

Your dog might not get enough rest, either

The same effect goes for our pets, too. When we move around at night, get up to use the bathroom, or wake from a bad dream, we can disrupt our dogs' sleep cycles. As mentioned above, sleep deprivation can lead to a slew of further problems.

You'll probably need to wash your bedding more often

Especially if you have asthma or environmental allergies. Fur comes with the dog parenthood territory, but it can be extra bothersome when it finds its way to your pillowcase.

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You might let your dog sleep in bed with you if...

  • There's plenty of room for everyone to stretch out
  • You don't disrupt each other's rest
  • You and your dog both benefit from the social connection of pre-sleep snuggles
  • Your dog has a medical condition (like epilepsy) you feel better directly monitoring overnight
  • You feel safer or more comfortable with your dog nearby
  • Your dog does not resource guard and will get off when asked

You might not let your dog sleep in bed with you if...

  • Your dog struggles with resource guarding your furniture
  • Your dog easily startles out of sleep, which can interrupt your own rest (and cause injury in extreme cases)
  • You or your pup can't get enough deep rest while sharing the bed
  • Your bed is too small for everyone to fit comfortably
  • Your dog is still working on potty or crate training
  • Either of you simply prefer having your own space to sleep

Do what works for you

If your dog loves sleeping with you—and you love it too? Enjoy all the nighttime cuddles. If you've decided sharing the bed isn't right for your situation? We back you up. There are good reasons on both sides. What matters is making an informed choice you feel good about.

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